Your Beliefs Don’t Make You a Better Person; How You Treat Others Does
"Your Beliefs Don’t Make You a Better Person; How You Treat Others Does"
There’s a hard truth we don’t like to talk about much in faith circles, or in society at large. It’s this: you can believe all the right things, hold all the right opinions, quote Scripture, vote your values, and attend every church service—and still be unkind, ungracious, or downright cruel.
Let’s sit with that for a moment.
Beliefs are important. I’m a man of deep faith. My relationship with God shapes my decisions, grounds my identity, and gives me hope when nothing else makes sense. But I’ve come to understand that beliefs, in and of themselves, don’t define someone’s character. It’s how we treat others that tells the real story.
You can believe in forgiveness and still hold grudges.
You can believe in grace and still dish out judgment.
You can believe in love and still be cold to the person who doesn’t think or live like you.
That’s where the disconnect happens—when beliefs become a badge rather than a compass.
We are living in a time where people are more eager to declare their beliefs than to live them out. Social media is full of bold statements about faith, morality, justice, and truth. But behind those words, too often, is a lack of compassion. People weaponize their beliefs, using them to elevate themselves while tearing others down. They talk about kindness but gossip freely. They promote unity but spread division. And in the process, they forget one of the simplest and most powerful teachings in all of Scripture: love your neighbor.
Not agree with your neighbor. Not fix your neighbor. Love your neighbor.
Jesus didn’t say they had to earn it first. He didn’t give us a checklist of requirements someone has to meet before they deserve to be treated with respect. He simply told us to love—because how we treat people is the clearest reflection of who we are and what we truly believe.
You see, it’s easy to love those who love us back. It’s easy to show kindness when it’s comfortable. But the real test of a person’s heart is how they treat others when it’s inconvenient, awkward, or even painful. The person you disagree with. The one who offended you. The one you find difficult or confusing or downright frustrating. That’s where your beliefs either come to life—or reveal themselves to be nothing more than talk.
I know people who rarely talk about faith but live with such deep compassion, generosity, and humility that I can’t help but see the love of God in them. And I’ve seen people who claim to live by Scripture but treat others with coldness, cruelty, and superiority. It’s not the belief that defines a better person. It’s the behavior that flows from it.
The Gospel isn’t a performance. It’s not a spotlight. It’s not about who shouts the loudest or who looks the holiest. It’s about how we show up in people’s lives. Do we listen? Do we serve? Do we forgive? Do we make room at the table?
Because at the end of the day, no one will remember how well you argued your beliefs. They’ll remember how you made them feel. Did you see them? Did you hear them? Did you treat them with dignity, even if they didn’t agree with you?
God doesn’t call us to be known by our titles, our bumper stickers, or our Sunday best. He calls us to be known by our love.
So here’s my encouragement to you—and to myself. Let your beliefs be more than words. Let them take root in your heart and spill over into your actions. Let them show up in how you speak, how you listen, how you care for the people right in front of you.
Because at the end of the day, it won’t be the beliefs we claimed that matter most. It’ll be the love we gave, the grace we offered, and the way we treated people along the way.
—Dr. Nick
