If They Talk About You, They’re Talking About Others Too

It’s funny how quick some folks are to repeat a story—especially when it isn’t theirs to tell.

We all know people who always seem to have the “inside scoop,” the ones who say things like “Well, I heard…” with a grin and a lowered voice. But here’s the truth: if they’re talking about you behind your back, they’re almost certainly talking about others too. And if someone is comfortable spilling another person’s business to you, what makes you think they’re not doing the exact same thing when you’re not in the room?

Let’s be real—gossip is cheap. It’s easy. It doesn’t require facts, context, or courage. It only requires a willing mouth and an eager ear. Most of the time, gossip isn’t about truth at all—it’s about control, power, or just plain boredom. It’s about someone feeling better about themselves by dragging someone else down a few notches.

But here’s what I’ve learned—often the people doing the most talking are the most insecure. They use other people’s stories as a distraction from their own mess. And sometimes, the story they’re telling has just enough truth in it to sound believable, but not enough to be fair. Twisted facts. Omitted context. Personal bias. It’s all part of the recipe.

I’ve been on the receiving end of that before. You probably have too. The part that hurts the most isn’t always the lie—it’s knowing that someone who smiled to your face didn’t have the guts to say something to you directly. It’s the betrayal of someone you thought was in your corner. And it can make you question who you can trust at all.

But don’t let that bitterness take root. Don’t let gossip make you suspicious of everyone or closed off to connection. You don’t have to trust blindly—but you also don’t have to live guarded all the time. You just need wisdom. And a little gut instinct. And a whole lot of grace.

So here’s what I remind myself—and maybe you need to hear it too:
Don’t believe everything people say about others.
Don’t believe everything they say about you, either.
And most of all—don’t let what others say determine your worth.

Your value isn’t based on public opinion. It’s rooted in who you are when no one’s watching. It’s in how you treat people who can do nothing for you. It’s in the way you show up—with consistency, with character, and with courage.

And if people are talking about you? That stings, sure. But don’t waste your energy trying to manage their narrative. Let your integrity speak louder than their assumptions. Let your peace be proof that you’re not playing their game.

Keep your head high. Keep your circle tight. And when you hear that tempting little tidbit about someone else, pause and ask yourself: “Would I want someone saying this about me?” If the answer is no—close your mouth, and open your heart instead.

Because in the end, grace will always outlast gossip. And truth always finds its way to the surface.

Let them talk. You keep walking.