A Promise to Yourself

A Promise to Yourself

We make promises all the time. To friends. To family. To bosses. To the dog (usually about walkies or snacks). We even make promises we never plan on keeping—like “I’ll start the diet on Monday” or “I’ll go to bed early tonight.” But the hardest promises, the ones that often get ignored, are the ones we make to ourselves.

Maybe it's because we think no one’s watching. There’s no accountability buddy standing behind us with a clipboard and a whistle. No guilt trips from others if we fall short. Just us… quietly letting ourselves down while brushing it off with a “next time.”

But here’s the thing: breaking promises to yourself chips away at your self-worth. Every time you say “I’ll prioritize my health,” “I’ll stop answering work emails after 7,” or “I’ll finally leave this toxic environment”—and don’t follow through—you’re teaching yourself that your needs are negotiable. That your boundaries are flexible. That your voice doesn’t matter.

I’ve done this more times than I care to admit. Told myself I’d take a day off and then filled it with tasks to stay “caught up.” Promised I’d walk away from things that were draining me… only to hang on tighter out of guilt or fear. Promised I’d rest, recharge, or say no—and then didn’t. Because “someone needed me,” or “it wasn’t the right time,” or “I’ll just push through a little longer.” Sound familiar?

But here’s what I’ve learned the hard way: no one can keep a promise to you better than you. And no one suffers more when you break it.

A promise to yourself is sacred. It’s a declaration that you matter. That your peace, your growth, your healing, your joy—they’re not afterthoughts. They’re priorities.

So what’s a promise you need to make today? Maybe it’s something big, like leaving a job that’s eating your spirit. Maybe it’s small, like sitting down for dinner without your phone. Maybe it’s just this: “I will be kind to myself, even when I mess up.”

Whatever it is, write it down. Speak it out loud. Believe that you deserve to keep it. Then do the slow, steady work of honoring it every day—even if no one else sees. Even if it’s messy. Even if you have to start over ten times. Because every time you keep a promise to yourself, you build a foundation of trust and self-respect that no one can take from you.

And if you’ve broken promises before, welcome to the club. Start again. Grace isn’t canceled just because you got tired or scared or distracted. We are all works in progress.

This isn’t about perfection. It’s about commitment.

So go ahead—make the promise. Then keep it like your life depends on it. Because, in a lot of ways, it does.

—Dr. Nick